“What the heck was I thinking? I can’t do this!” That thought has probably crossed the minds of every single nurse at some point in their career. It may have been caused by a particular event or it could have been a terrible epiphany that you made a horrible mistake in your career choice. At some point, every one of us has had that sinking feeling that maybe we don’t actually belong in this career. While not uncommon, impostor syndrome as a nurse can be debilitating in a career that depends on trusting your education and instincts.
How can we fight it? How can we help our confidence grow so that we know that we do, in fact, deserve those letters after our name? Can we protect ourselves from the inevitable blows to the ego from haunting us? I’m here to help. Why? Because I’ve been there. There are days that I’m still there, wondering how I possibly made it this far.
What is Impostor Syndrome?
Impostor syndrome is the hard-to-shake feeling that you don’t belong somewhere. It doesn’t matter how many times people say you’re a good nurse. You don’t believe it. So what if you passed nursing school and the Boards? Pure luck. You go through each shift wondering if this is going to be the day that everyone figures out what a truly terrible nurse you are. The more you think about it, the more you prove to yourself that you don’t actually know anything. You should probably quit before you kill someone.
Except…you probably haven’t killed anyone. Your patients made it through your care because you DO in fact know what you’re doing. You made it through nursing school because of your intelligence. Impostor syndrome as nurse is a syndrome, a group of feelings that make up this larger feeling that you don’t belong in this field. But these feelings of inadequacy are just that, feelings. Not facts.
Impostor Syndrome As a Nurse
If the famously wise and confident Maya Angelou says that she has suffered from impostor syndrome, what chance do the rest of us have to avoid it? Now, if you’ve been a nurse for more than five minutes, you know that this career is not for the weak. Every single day is going to bring about some sort of challenge. Just when you think that you’ve gotten your groove, there’s going to be some sort of wild curve ball that is going to knock you right off your feet.
That’s okay. That’s NORMAL.
I think it’s safe to say that most of us graduated nursing school and passed our boards thinking we had enough knowledge to be a semi-decent nurse right off the bat. Then, somewhere during that very first shift, we suddenly knew what a deer felt like when he wanders into the road and sees a car zooming at them. Holy cow…I know NOTHING! This was such a mistake. Any minute, my preceptor is going to wonder how such a moron made it through nursing school.
Even if you’re further along in your career, impostor syndrome can still sneak up on you. Maybe it’s a new job or a new skill that you’re being trained in. Those feelings of “if I don’t get this right now, I’m never going to” start creeping in. It doesn’t matter how many times the person training you says you’re doing great. You’re not doing as great as he or she is. That must mean you’re failing, right?
How to Overcome Impostor Syndrome as a Nurse
There is a fantastic article by Robyn Correll, MPH from berxi.com on how to cope with impostor syndrome for all healthcare workers. Please read it when you get a chance, because she really does a great job on delving into the “why” behind the syndrome. She talks about things like anxiety, perfectionism and unrealistic expectations of ourselves as just some of the reason we suffer from impostor syndrome. I’ll give you a brief rundown on some of the great advice on how to overcome impostor syndrome as a nurse.
Don't be afraid to ask for feedback
I know, I know, why ask for something you don’t want to hear? But, one of the reasons impostor syndrome is so prevalent is because we already think of ourselves as failures. Getting some honest (hopefully kindhearted) suggestions on how to improve will help us feel more proactive. Constructive criticism, as long as delivered nicely, can help us become better nurses.
Be kind to yourself
The way you talk to yourself matters. It matters how to treat yourself after a “failure.” I’ve talked about this in other posts, but I used to really struggle with IV starts. It took me a long time to simply be “good enough” at them. One thing I began to notice was how I would talk to myself before I would even try. “Don’t blow this one. If you this, you really should just quit nursing. Look at those veins. I blind person could start this IV.” And then, guess what would happen almost every time? I would miss it. The abuse I dealt myself before attempting the IV was nothing compared to what I would tell myself after I failed.
Once I started giving myself a little grace, it was amazing how quickly my IV game improved. Remember that when you’re about to do something you’re nervous about. Tell yourself, “you can do this. Just try your best.” If it doesn’t go perfectly (and the patient is okay), try to shrug it off and you’ll say you’ll do better next time.
Accept compliments
Allow yourself to feel good when someone says you did a great job at something. Don’t brush it off or self-deprecate yourself. Say thank you and allow that praise to carry you through your next bout of self-doubt.
Reflect on the "why" behind your impostor syndrome
Did you grow up with a lot of criticism and/or unrealistic expectations? Were mistakes or failures something that were punished or shamed? Getting to the root of why impostor syndrome affects you can help you fight back against it. If you need help, don’t be afraid to see a mental health professional. They can help you work through the sometimes deeply buried issues that may be causing your impostor syndrome. There is no shame in asking for help.
Make sure you're spending time with positive people
Have you noticed how your energy changes depending on the people you’re with? If you’re around the negative nellys all the time, it’s hard to focus on anything positive, especially when you’re already struggling to feel positive about yourself. Spend time with people that are happy to celebrate themselves as well as those around them.
Remember that mistakes are not failures
here is intense pressure in this career. Impostor syndrome as a nurse tends to make things seem more intense. Mistakes can have a lot more dire consequences in the health care world, so there is a lot of pressure to be perfect all of the time. But, the truth is, everyone makes mistakes sometimes. No one is perfect, so no one should try to be. Most of the time, mistakes (yes, even as a nurse) can be fixed. It doesn’t mean you’ve failed as a nurse. It means you’re a normal human being. You just need to allow yourself the grace to move on from it so that it doesn’t cripple your career.
Impostor Syndrome as Nurse Does NOT Mean That You're a Bad Nurse
This is going to be a cliché, but you need to remember why you started on this path to begin with. If nursing was something that you were passionate about before, there’s a reason for that. You were put on this journey because we need you here. We need you in this field. Your patients need you in this field. Impostor syndrome as a nurse doesn’t mean that you don’t belong. It means that you do. You’re a good nurse because you actually care about being a good nurse. It means that you’re always going to be working hard to improve. You’re always going to be careful. Just give yourself a little break and remember why you wanted to be a nurse to begin with. Because you care!
All my love!