I was part of the problem.
It’s no secret that there is this HUGE stigma surrounding mental illness. People that don’t have it will never quite understand. They say things like, “Just be happy! Your life is amazing!” or “Stop worrying about every little thing,” or “it’s all in your head.”
OF COURSE IT’S IN OUR HEADS, THAT’S WHY IT’S CALLED MENTAL ILLNESS!
Anyway…those types of statements, however well-meaning, come off as judgmental and condescending. That’s why a lot of people with mental illness hide it away as best they can.
My name is Maureen. I’m a mother to two incredible girls, a wife, a registered nurse and a longtime (most likely lifelong) sufferer of anxiety and depression. I say I was part of the problem because I did everything I could to hide them away. I mastered the world’s most stoic face that said, ‘Nothing wrong here. Everything is completely normal and I am completely normal. I definitely wasn’t imagining waking up to find one of my daughters had died in her sleep and what I would do.’
Oh that?
That’s the anxiety portion of my brain. The way I see it, there are three (at least) parts to my mind. The anxious part that you just met, the depressed part and the logical/rational/almost normal part. I feel like the anxiety and depression are big giant bullies that love to pick on the wimpy logical part while also trying to dominate the other.
I imagine their conversations go something like this:
Anxiety: I can list at least 100 things that could go wrong with this situation.
Depression: So what? It doesn’t matter if it goes right or wrong, life sucks anyway.
Logic: Actually guys, the chances of something going wrong are really quite small. Think of all the times…
“SHUT UP NERD!” Anxiety and Depression shout in unison and Logic timidly retreats back into the corner.
What’s in this for you?
I promise this blog is not all about me whining about my personal struggles with anxiety and depression (but there may be a little, it’s really freaking hard!). As mentioned, I’ve struggled for such a long time. The world keeps moving on. Those kids of mine still have to eat. There are no options other than having to somehow function as a normal, productive member of society. I have picked up some tricks to make that a little easier.
I know how hard it is to drag yourself out of bed in the morning to face yet another day of this. I want to support, encourage and motivate you to push/pull/drag/whatever it takes to keep moving forward. No matter what, there are always, always better days ahead. I want to be here for you in your bad days and celebrate your good days.
Whatever it was that led you to my page, I can’t tell you how glad I am that you stopped by. I hope you’ll find something here that can help you or at least make you smile as I try to interject some humor into our struggles. Disclaimer (you’ll see these a lot, I hope you learn to find them endearing): I will never mean to make light of the seriousness of mental illness, but will try to use humor to lessen the burden of it.
This is me. I can’t wait to get to know you. Feel free to comment, but please be sure to be kind to everyone. We’re all struggling here and I really want this to be a judgment free zone. Please visit my ‘terms of use’ section before commenting.
Again, welcome!
